0 comments

Fava Beans

The Jerky Boys, album 2

Title: Fava Beans

Characters:

Summary:

In this comedic phone conversation skit, a disgruntled customer calls a restaurant to complain about becoming sick after eating Fava beans. The customer accuses the restaurant of serving him the beans that allegedly caused his illness. The exchange becomes increasingly absurd and humorous as the customer describes his extreme symptoms, including his wife lying in a bowl of urine and vomiting. The restaurant employee, identified as Charlie, vehemently denies serving any Fava beans and questions the accuracy of the customer’s claims. The conversation takes a surreal turn when the customer threatens to come to the restaurant and make Charlie eat his own shoes. Despite the escalating tension, Charlie continues to deny any wrongdoing, insisting that the Fava beans are good and nothing untoward happened. The skit plays with the absurdity of the situation, creating humor through the exaggerated nature of the customer’s complaints and the restaurant employee’s incredulous responses. The comedic element is heightened by the over-the-top threats and bizarre scenarios described by the customer. Ultimately, the skit ends with the customer expressing skepticism about the restaurant’s food quality, and the restaurant employee maintaining his innocence, leaving the resolution ambiguous and the humor intact.

 
Transcript:

0:00 Phone rings..

0:03 Voice 1: “Can I help you?”

0:04 Voice 2: “Yeah, is it the restaurant?”

0:06 Voice 1: “Yes, it is.”

0:06 Voice 2: “Yeah, I was there a little while ago with my wife…”

0:09 Voice 1: “Uh-huh.”

0:09 Voice 2: “…and we ate some of them Fava beans.”

0:11 Voice 1: “Yes.”

0:12 Voice 2: “They got me fuckin’ awful sick there Charlie.”

0:15 Voice 1: “Who… what Fava beans?”

0:17 Voice 2: “You made me some Fava beans there with the, the little whacky… the bread that you got there.  You got me sick as a dog.”

0:23 Voice 1: “Well, what are you… where are you… where were you sitting sir?”

0:26 Voice 2: “What?’

0:27 Voice 1: “Where were you sitting?”

0:28 Voice 2: “I was sitting out there by the front there.  You know I got really sick from that shit.  I ought to split your nuts from your head to the back of your [Inaudible 00:34].”

0:35 Voice 1: “No, no, no, no, no… nothing happened.   Nobody order Fava bean.  I didn’t serve Fava bean.”

0:38 Voice 2: “I got Fava beans.  They got them all over coming out my ears backwards now.  I’m sick like a fuckin’ animal over here.

0:43 Voice 1: “Fava bean and what?”

0:44 Voice 2: “You got my wife fuckin’, layin’ in a fuckin’ bowl of piss over here, fuckin’, pukin’ up shit.”

0:49 Voice 1: “Whoa! Whoa!  Why you lying?  What are you talking about, so what it…?”

0:51 Voice 2: “Look, you jerky little ass.  I ought to split your nuts off the side of your face.”

0:56 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 00:56], what did you order?  What did your order?”

0:57 Voice 2: “I told ya I ordered those Fava beans over there.  You got them things fuckin’ stinkin’ up the house now.”

1:02 Voice 1: “Just Fava beans?”

1:03 Voice 2: “Yeah, the Fava beans with all that silly little juice on there, you fuckin’ whacky ass.”

1:07 Voice 1: “I didn’t.  I didn’t… well, I didn’t serve any Fava beans there.  I’m…”

1:10 Voice 2: “Alright.  You’re angry with me now.  Maybe I ought to come down there and fuckin’ make you eat…

1:13 Voice 1: “Excuse me.”

1:13 Voice 2: …eat your fucking’ shoe.”

1:14 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 01:14]… excuse me.  I didn’t serve any Fava bean today.  Just tell me where you were sitting.”

1:18 Voice 2: “I… I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’m gonna come down and I’m gonna stuff your shoes.  Look, you [Inaudible 01:21] restaurant.

1:22 Voice 1: “Yes.”

1:23 Voice 2: “I’ll come down and make you eat your fuckin’ shoes.”

1:24 Voice 1: “[Inaudible 01:24].”

1:25 Voice 2: “I’m sick like a fuckin’ idiot over here.”

1:27 Voice 1: “No… nothing happened.”  

1:28 Voice 2: “Aah!”

1:29 Voice 1: “The Fava bean is good.  Everything is good.  Nobody…”

1:30 Voice 2: “Oh, alright there.  Let’s see how good it is.  I’ll see you [Inaudible 01:33] Charlie.”

The Jerky Boys Store: A Hilarious Tribute to Prank Calls and Fava Beans

Laughter has always been a universal language, and comedy has the power to bring people together in the most unexpected ways. One of the shining stars in the realm of prank calls is the iconic duo known as the Jerky Boys. With their outrageous characters and memorable phone conversations, they have left an indelible mark on the world of comedy. Today, we delve into the world of the Jerky Boys and explore how their influence has even extended to an online store that pays tribute to their comedic genius, with a surprising connection to fava beans.

The Jerky Boys: Masters of Prank Calls:

The Jerky Boys, consisting of Johnny Brennan and Kamal Ahmed, burst onto the scene in the late 1980s, captivating audiences with their ingenious prank calls. Through a series of telephone conversations, the duo created a cast of unique characters, each with their own quirks and catchphrases. From Frank Rizzo, the foul-mouthed New Yorker, to Sol Rosenberg, the perpetually confused man with numerous ailments, the Jerky Boys displayed unparalleled improvisational talent and comedic timing.

Their prank calls were a mix of absurdity, satire, and raw wit. They would call unsuspecting victims, adopting various personas, and engage them in hilarious conversations, often pushing the boundaries of common decency. These calls were recorded and shared on albums, which quickly became cult classics and helped solidify the Jerky Boys’ place in comedy history.

Jerky Boys Store: A Tribute to Comedy and Fava Beans:

The Jerky Boys’ unique brand of humor has garnered a loyal following over the years, and fans can now celebrate their comedic legacy through the Jerky Boys Store (https://www.jerkyboysstore.com/). This online emporium offers a treasure trove of merchandise inspired by the duo’s prank calls, providing fans with a chance to own a piece of comedic history.

One particularly intriguing item in the Jerky Boys Store is their Fava Beans. As fans of the Jerky Boys would know, references to fava beans became a recurring theme in their prank calls. This seemingly random inclusion has since become an inside joke among followers of the duo. The Jerky Boys Store pays homage to this comedic quirk by offering “Jerky Boys Fava Beans” as a whimsical keepsake.

The fava beans themselves are not meant for consumption but are rather a playful nod to the iconic prank calls. Packaged in a tin adorned with artwork showcasing the Jerky Boys’ signature characters, these novelty beans serve as a conversation starter and a way for fans to share a laugh while reminiscing about the unforgettable comedy that Johnny Brennan and Kamal Ahmed created.

Beyond Fava Beans: A Comedy Legacy:

The Jerky Boys’ influence on comedy reaches far beyond their prank calls and merchandise. Their unique style and ability to captivate audiences through the sheer absurdity of their characters have inspired countless comedians and pranksters. From their irreverent humor to their masterful improvisation, the Jerky Boys showed that laughter has no bounds.

Even though the Jerky Boys have not released new material in recent years, their legacy lives on through their fans and the dedicated Jerky Boys Store. This online platform continues to be a hub for enthusiasts who want to relive the magic of those prank calls and pay homage to the duo’s comedic genius.

The Jerky Boys remain a legendary comedy act, leaving an indelible mark on the world of prank calls and comedy as a whole. The Jerky Boys Store not only provides fans with a chance to own merchandise that celebrates their comedic legacy but also serves as a testament to the enduring impact of their work. From their infamous f