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Jocko Johnson

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The Home Wrecker – the woke version

Title: The Relationship Consultant

[The scene opens with a phone ringing. A person picks up.]

Caller: Hello?

Character 1: Hi, yes, is this the residence of Mr. and Mrs. Johnson?

Caller: Yes, it is. May I ask who’s calling?

Character 1: Of course, my name is Alex, and I’m a relationship consultant. I specialize in resolving conflicts and fostering healthy communication in relationships.

Caller: Oh, um, okay. How can I help you?

Character 1: Well, I’ve been informed that there might be some discord in your relationship, and I’m here to offer my assistance in any way possible.

Caller: [Skeptical] Really? I mean, we’ve been going through some rough patches lately, but how did you know?

Character 1: It’s my job to be aware of these things and to reach out to provide support when needed. Would you be open to discussing what’s been troubling you?

Caller: I suppose so. [Reluctantly] But I’m not sure how much it would help.

Character 1: Trust me, a fresh perspective and some constructive guidance can often make a significant difference. So, what seems to be the main issue in your relationship?

[The conversation continues, with Character 1 offering compassionate and understanding advice, focusing on communication, empathy, and mutual respect. The tone is supportive and non-judgmental throughout.]

Caller: Wow, I never thought about it that way. You’ve given me a lot to think about.

Character 1: I’m glad I could provide some clarity. Remember, relationships require effort from both parties, but with open communication and a willingness to understand each other’s perspectives, you can overcome any obstacle.

Caller: Thank you so much for your help. I feel like we might have a chance to work through this now.

Character 1: That’s what I’m here for. If you ever need further assistance or guidance, don’t hesitate to reach out. Take care, and I wish you both the best on your journey toward a healthier, happier relationship.

[The call ends with the caller feeling hopeful and empowered to address their relationship issues in a constructive manner.]

[End of skit.]

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The Home Wrecker

The Jerky Boys, album 1

Title: The Home Wrecker

Characters: Jocko Johnson

Summary:

The skit revolves around Jocko Johnson, who calls a demolition service seeking to tear down a house. His motive is fueled by his partner leaving him, and he wants revenge by demolishing the house she left behind. Jocko insists on urgency, wanting it done before she returns from a trip, aiming for a surprise.

The comedic element unfolds as Jocko, in his brash and insensitive manner, interacts with the female receptionist. He provides the address and details about the house, emphasizing the urgency and his desire for a quick demolition. Amid the conversation about the demolition, Jocko attempts flirtation, making inappropriate comments to the receptionist about running a potential hot dog stand after the demolition.

The receptionist handles the call professionally, attempting to gather necessary information while trying to politely brush off Jocko’s advances. Despite his persistent and crass comments, she maintains her composure and promises to have her boss call him back regarding the demolition request.

The skit combines humor with the contrast between Jocko’s aggressive, impulsive behavior and the receptionist’s professional demeanor. Jocko’s inappropriate comments and the receptionist’s subtle dismissals create the comedic tension throughout the conversation. Ultimately, the skit ends with the receptionist politely ending the call after Jocko’s persistent advances.

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