Mining For Scotty – Frank Rizzo
The Jerky Boys, album 4
Title: Mining For Scotty
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary: Frank Rizzo makes a deal with a Japanese mining company to harvest “dilithium crystals”.
Transcript:
Frank Rizzo
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Frank Rizzo Baseball Cap
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Cold Feet – Frank Rizzo
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Cold Feet [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, vol 4 album
Title: Cold Feet
Characters: Frank Rizzo, Acupuncturist
Summary:
Transcript:
You Wanna Scrap?
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The Jerky Boys, Stop Staring at Me!
Title: You Wanna Scrap?
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary:
In this comedic skit, Frank calls a number he found in the yellow pages under “scrap” but faces a series of misunderstandings. He believes he’s speaking to someone related to a Howard Stern show, accusing them of threatening to beat him up on air. The person on the other end is confused and denies any knowledge, leading to a hilarious exchange where Frank persists, insisting they know Stern and even makes colorful threats. As the conversation progresses, it becomes increasingly clear that Frank has dialed the wrong number, frustrating the person receiving the call, who eventually hangs up on him, leaving Frank somewhat apologetic for his language but still oblivious to the mistaken identity. The skit is a comedy of errors, showcasing miscommunication and mistaken assumptions, resulting in a humorous and absurd conversation.
Transcript:
Big Hock
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Product on sale
The Jerky Boys Logo T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99. -
Big Hock [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, Stop Staring at Me!
Title: Big Hock
Characters: Frank Rizzo, Jake
Summary:
The skit features a phone conversation between Jake and Frank, with Frank claiming to be an aspiring professional football player seeking representation. Frank insists he’s a talented semi-pro fullback, playing for the Bayside Raiders, though there’s confusion about the team name and his nickname, “Big Hock” being mistaken for something else.
Frank boasts about his prowess, citing his weight, strength, and willingness to “walk through walls” for the team. He’s eager for an agent, willing to offer a hefty 20% commission, emphasizing his dream to play in the NSL (likely NFL). Jake, seemingly a representative, navigates the conversation with humor, at times misunderstanding Frank’s words or deliberately twisting them, leading to playful banter.
Frank’s exaggerated claims, mixed with confusion about his nickname and team, create a comedic exchange. Despite Jake’s attempts to redirect the conversation and handle Frank’s eccentricities, Frank remains persistent and enthusiastic, showcasing his determination to achieve his dream of playing professional football.
The skit revolves around Frank’s overconfident yet endearing personality, his persistence in wanting representation, and Jake’s patient, witty handling of the conversation’s humorous twists and turns.
Transcript:
Hucklebuck
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Product on sale
The Jerky Boys T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99. -
Product on sale
Frank Rizzo T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99. -
Hucklebuck [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, Stop Staring at Me!
Title: Hucklebuck
Characters: Frank Rizzo, Juggy
Summary:
Transcript:
Truck Registration – Frank Rizzo
The Jerky Boys, Album 4
Title: Truck Registration
Characters: Frank Rizzo, DMV Agent
Summary:
Transcript:
Testing For Jeopardy – Frank Rizzo
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Product on saleThe Jerky Boys T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99.
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Product on saleFrank Rizzo T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99.
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Testing For Jeopardy [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, vol 4 album
Title: Testing For Jeopardy
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary:
Transcript:
Angry Camper’s Dad
The Jerky Boys, album 3
Title: Angry Camper’s Dad
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary:
Transcript:
Body Building
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Body Building [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, album 3
Title: Body Building
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary:
Transcript:
1-800-How’s My Driving
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Product on saleFrank Rizzo T-ShirtOriginal price was: $44.99.$39.99Current price is: $39.99.
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1-800-How’s My Driving? [Explicit]$1.29
The Jerky Boys, album 3
Title: 1-800-How’s My Driving
Characters: Frank Rizzo
Summary:
In this skit, Frank Rizzo has just experienced a traumatic incident where someone backed over his legs with a vehicle. He calls a customer service line, presumably related to the incident, and begins a conversation with Voice 2. Frank is visibly agitated and frustrated as he recounts the details of the accident.
Frank expresses his dismay at the situation, claiming that his legs are now “shattered” and describing them as looking like “chop meat.” He is particularly irritated by the questions and requests for information from Voice 2, such as his name and number. Frank sarcastically questions the qualifications of the drivers and wonders if they are pulled off the streets or subways.
As the conversation progresses, Frank becomes increasingly agitated and shares his frustration with the difficulty of providing information while he’s lying under the truck with crushed legs. He humorously suggests he could give serial numbers but mocks the idea of identifying the company name. Throughout the dialogue, Frank’s dark humor emerges as he describes the gruesome condition of his legs, including a potential “mad awful stink” emanating from them.
The call takes an unexpected turn when Voice 2 mentions terminating the call, leaving Frank perplexed and frustrated. The skit ends with a suggestion to visit a “1-800 How is my driving?” service.
Overall, the skit satirizes the challenges and absurdities of dealing with customer service in the aftermath of a traumatic event, using dark humor and exaggerated frustration to highlight the difficulties of gathering information in such situations.
Transcript: